The Flasher in The Library

Today's request from the children was...a trip to the library.

 In spite of the huge haul of books that Santa brought, they still wanted to see what they could borrow from the library.

Our local one is brilliant, but so far we've had a mixed relationship.

I.

There was the 'too much too young' phase when we really only went there to pass some time but invariably had to leave because they were too loud.

Then there was the 'can't show our face' phase when I just used to just pay for the books rather than try explain how they got damaged.

But recently we've been having a good run of things.

Until today that is....

I had to renew the girls cards at the desk today and during the few minutes I was distracted the littlest man went missing. Some frantic running about ensued but to no avail. 

Eventually we decided to check the toilet. I wasn't prepared for the scene that greeted us.

One small boy was located, we just had to follow the trail of discarded, poo stained, pants and underpants, socks AND shoes to find him. We are talking poo of donkey like proportions!!

15 minutes of frantic cleaning followed, everything from the floor, to the toilet, to the little boy himself....thank the lord for wet wipes. This process was witnessed by no less than 5 different girls who went to use the toilets...let's just say it may have put them off having children for life.

So on a bitterly cold winter day I had no choice but to put back on his coat and proceed back to the car with one little man who was naked from the waist down. His coat covered the essentials...just about. 

As we were about to leave the library, we passed an elderly lady who looked slightly bemused at himself, I smiled back in that 'I'm mortified but trying not to be' way and then he did it....he pulled up his coat and ran, roaring laughing, past her.

I have no idea if she laughed or not...I grabbed the girls and ran, scooping my semi naked, fully crazy little boy and headed to the car before social services caught us.

Let's just say it will be a LONG time before we make a return trip.